Sometimes life plays jokes on us.
Sometimes your husband loves to tease (lovingly I’m going to assume) your last #Beauty4Balance post about To Do Lists before vacation started. And as ridiculous as it is, and he is, you have a pretty good giggle about it.
We all laugh. Because….well….because “poop” on a “To Do List” is hillarious. I don’t care who you are.
(And side note: I saw this on a hike the other day and laughed out loud as the sun shown perfectly on it. It was like it was posing for this picture. Phew….things are just funny sometimes, ya know!?)
Anyway….moving up in maturity level a little….
Sometimes you are 11 and you are starting to have complicated emotions. You are starting to pick up on adult problems and complex relationship dynamics. And it kind of pisses you off.
Sometimes this means you need a shoulder to cry on, a supportive ear to listen, and a hug. Sometimes it means you want to go on a walk because you are SO bored. But then don’t actually want to be on the walk. And you are SO mad when you realize you have to walk back too. And sometimes this leads to your Dad calling you “Dr. Bri and Ms. Hormones” and asking if you have Hormonalitis or need anti-hormonal treatments.
Of course he thinks that he is hilarious.
And you react like any respectable pre-teen should.
We all laugh. The light-hearted kind. The kind that makes you delight in people around you.
Sometimes you are the wife of the eldest of 4 heirs to the family cabins and the drama of all the disagreement is driving you crazy. There are things you don’t like or agree with. There are people who don’t like or agree with your ideas. There is a lot of talk. Not a lot of action. You don’t have control. No one really does.
So sometimes you can’t take it anymore and decide to try an idea out -just give it a whirl. No one will ever know. And Sometimes you might get away with things like that – who knows!? But Sometimes you get yourself, your daughter in-law, your son, and your husband caught couch-in-hand moving around a living room layout that contains years of memories and hasn’t changed in decades.
(This picture is a couple days after the moment I am describing. But things look different – trust me)
Everyone holds their breath. We finish the task. Leave.
And we all laugh. The kind that comes from deep in the gut and brings tears to your eyes. The kind that makes you say “phew! That was funny!” at the end of it. Because really….could that timing have been anymore like a citcom!?
Sometimes you’re 4 days short of turning 31, 1.5 months short of 2 years of wifedom, and about 6 years into the role of step-momming (even though you didn’t have the title the whole time). You are contemplating future children and feeling intimidated by the existing dyanimcs of your husband and his family’s experiences. You are immersed in their world and unrelated dramas when you find yourself bringing up your own fears and insecurities that are related to them. Sure, it could have been the wine. It also could have been (and likely was) because the fears and insecurities are real.
And suddenly you find yourself in (VERY) unexpected and embarrassing tears in front of everybody. Sigh.
You feel vulnerable and it’s scary. But then you remember words of those ever-wiser than yourself.
So you tell your husband about it – so someone else who truly understands you could hear and appreciate your ability to surprise yourself in off-guard moments like these.
And we laugh. The knowing kind. The head-shaking, shoulder-shrugging “what are you gonna do but laugh? This is life.” kind.
And you know that tomorrow you get to look at this view again so….. is life really that terrible? No.
Life is simply a big practical jokester. Always Keeping us on our toes. Ensuring we stay humble. Reminding us not to take ourselves too seriously. And offering us the best it has to offer – laughter.
I choose to be thankful.
~Be Gentle. Be Beautiful. Embrace the Mess.
Previous #Beauty4Balance posts:
How #Beauty4Balance got started: #Beauty4Balance: Day 1. Trumped. Challenge Accepted.
And then Backwards from here on Day 13: